EADJ Fashion Round-Up: End of February Edition

Minion Chic.

Striped sleeves + blue vest = Raggedy Walmart.

Both articles match, in that they're both blue and are 3 sizes too small.

Spotted at Jiffy Lube: Won't you be my muffler?

What in the Sta-Puft is Zoe Saldana wearing? I know it's a winter promotion, but JEEZ.

UAG

LOOK OUT, TASK CHAIR. CHORE COAT WILL CHOKE YOU OUT

TAKE A SEAT, TASK CHAIR, CUZ THE GLOVES ARE OFF AND THIS CHORE COAT IS ON.

CHORE COAT HAS NO PATIENCE FOR THIS PUSSY-ASS SITTING AROUND A HOME OFFICE LIKE A SLACKER. PUT ON A COTTON TWILL JACKET AND GET THE FUCK OUTSIDE.

GREAT GOD, LOOK AT YOUR FAT PASTY ASS. YOU NEED TO WALK MORE, SON. GO ON A HIKE. DO SOME ERRANDS ON FOOT. TAKE A FUCKING STROLL AROUND YOUR LOCAL RENOVATED DOWNTOWN AREA. JESUS CHRIST, IF YOUR ASS WERE A PILLOW I'D THROW IT OUT FOR BEING SO FLAT AND USELESS.

OH, DID WORK JUST EMAIL YOU CHANGES TO THE PRESENTATION? FUCK THAT SHIT. GO FOR A WALK AND CLEAR YOUR DUMB HEAD. GET SOME FRESH AIR. LEARN MORE ABOUT YOUR SURROUNDINGS. STOP BEING SUCH AN INSUFFERABLE, COWERING SIMP.

CHORE TO THE MUTHAFUCKIN COAT!