The Mexican Pizza and the McRib Meet the KFC Chizza

MP: Check it out, McRib.

M: What the hell is that?

C: Hey fellas! I'm the new KFC Chizza!

MP: Oh, I get it. Pepperoni and mozzarella on top of chicken. A Chizza.

C: Exactly! I'm chicken and pizza!

M: Nice portmanteau.

MP: Yeah, cute. But you're not really pizza. You're not on pizza dough.

C: Well, neither are you. You're a pair of big crackers. And your cheese isn't even mozzarella.

M: He's got you there, Mexican "Pizza".

MP: Shut up.

M: So, Chizza, are they buying a lot of you?

C: I'm doing respectable. Some chicken purists are offended by the pepperoni on top of chicken, though.

M: Fuck purists.

MP: Yeah, fuck 'em. If no one pushed boundaries, I'd never had been created.

M: Me neither. Here's to innovation!

C: Hear hear!

MP: You guys wanna grab a bite? I'm starving.

M: I could go for a Waldorf salad, frankly.

C: Oooh, that sounds GREAT.

Comic Strip Where The Last Panel Is Always A Remote Oil Rig

A Brief List of Terrible Baby Names For Girls

Cuvette

Angina

Arrhythmia

Fava

Genocide

Do'wanna

Medulla Oblongata

Sriracha

Euthanasia

Squeaky

Demean

Alopatia

Trivet

Isis

Sasparhonda

Fart

EADJ Surprising Hostility: Santander Bank

A new corporate bank has taken root in different parts of New York City, and it's a great time for EADJ to hate them off the bat. Santander Bank. Fuck them. Why?

Because nothing instills confidence like a cheap vinyl banner stuck over the previous bank's name. Really tells people you're in it for the long haul. Better deposit my life savings with the bank that's living out of a suitcase in case the Feds come.

The logo either looks like a plate on fire or a baby chick doing the "Thriller" dance (turn it on its side). Plus it's red and white with the word "Santa" on it. Nice borrowed interest, assholes (yes, that is a bank pun). 

So go fuck your tellers' mothers, Santander Bank. Maybe one day you too will go under and will end up as umbrella signage on a fruit cart out front. FUCK YOU