Showing posts with label malcolm gladwell. Show all posts
Showing posts with label malcolm gladwell. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 26, 2022

Dear Poster Designer For the 2022 Movie "Medieval" Directed by Petr Jákl



Hey. You're not fooling anybody, mister. The fact that you flopped the image, cropped out more of the legs, and put a mace or whatever in his other hand doesn't detract from the unavoidable fact that this is a direct copy of the 2000 poster for Ridley Scott's "Gladiator". I mean, steal from the best, right? But jeez. Maybe copy yourself after a movie that didn't win 12 Oscars and is considered the 94th greatest film of all time.

Who knows. Maybe this obscure movie from the Czech Republic is actually comparable or better than Gladiator. Do any of you readers want to check it out for us? Please?

Monday, April 15, 2019

A Rebuttal of The Tubes's "She's A Beauty" From The Alleged Beauty, Who Once Again Happens To Be Jocelyn Taylor-Heffernan! What Are The Chances?

Previous rebuttals here and here.



I know at this point, it looks like I'm looking for trouble- luring men and breaking their hearts. But honestly, I'm just a simple claims adjuster who has an after-work cocktail now and then. It's just been my extreme misfortune to be accosted by so many creepy musicians from the 80s! If there were another bar besides The Breakfast Club Bar near my work, believe me, I'd be going there instead!

One of the things I enjoy is having my drink over by the window. That way I can spot Tammy or Debora (not Debra or Deborah with the H) and call them inside to share a drinkie. But lately these guys named The Tubes have noticed me in the window and have started calling unwanted attention my way. Here is my point-by-point rebuttal of what they've been saying:

1) "Step right up and don't be shy / Because you will not believe your eyes / She's right here behind the glass / And you're gonna like her 'Cause she's got class" What the fuck? I'm minding my own business in a window, and now these assholes are charging admission for people to look at me? What about my privacy?!

2) "You can look inside another world / You get to talk to a pretty girl / She's everything you dream about / But don't fall in love" You can knock on the window or put your number on a piece of paper and put it against the glass, but I'm not talking to you.

3) "She's a beauty / She's one in a million girls / She's a beauty / Why would I lie? / Why would I lie?" You'd lie because I can read your lips that you're charging $5 to "check out this MILF's sexy gams". That does it. I'm calling the police next time I see you out there, Tubes.

Wednesday, August 16, 2017

New EADJ Segment: What Happened Next

This spring-themed set of stickers that came with an April issue of Children's Highlights Magazine looks happy and innocent enough, but EADJ dug deeper and discovered what happened next after these stickers were produced.


Ladybug Couple: a few weeks after these two got together, the female ladybug gave birth to a litter of what looked like half ladybug/half termite larvae. The male ladybug was so distraught with her infidelity, he pulled a one night stand with a praying mantis.


Cool Frog: drunk from a very strong mojito, the frog didn't realize that his inner tube had caught a riptide and had drifted to a shark-infested area. His surviving family wondered why a frog would choose to venture out into saltwater. "I guess his drinking problem got the better of him," his sister said at the wake.


Skating Lizard: This lizard's radical skate tricks caught the attention of the Sobe Energy Drink Company, and they promptly asked him to be a spokesperson for their Offshore Breeze flavor. This minor fame, however, caused him great grief with family members who suddenly started claiming he owed them money.

He hasn't spoken to his siblings for 3 years since.


Ant Picnic: Not long after this ant scene was published on a sticker, authorities wanted to know who could bake such a small sized muffin. The two ants refused to answer, but later claimed the muffin was a one-of-a-kind prop for the photoshoot. Unfortunately, the authorities did not believe them and launched a full investigation into the ants' business dealings. The ants lawyered up and fought the investigation but were ultimately found to be both delinquent in taxes and in failure to report that underage ants were manufacturing tiny red sneakers with socks.

The ants also refused to answer why they only had four legs.