Friday, November 3, 2023

Featured Speakers At the Next CES


The upcoming Consumer Electronics Show has booked some notable keynote speakers. Here's who to expect in Hall C:

• TAKIN Home Pregnancy Test CEO Mandy Takins will have intercourse with audience members to test out the latest kits

• Smuckers CEO Don LaGrippe will announce and smoke the new Goober Grape Vape

• Dirt Devil President Garry Rousseau will demonstrate the new "naughty" attachments

• HD DVD promoter Jessica Hundmann will return years later to complain how the HD DVD format was better than Blu Ray all along

• Samsung rep Xi Tsung will reveal the new fuckable TV

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